by alex grainger
photo by evan freer
Presence dropped his latest single “Loving Me & Losing You” on September 30th. The strikingly honest single reflects on Presence’s journey finding the joy in music again after making music and living for thousands online for so long. While reverting to his younger self to find joy, this single is one which sonically shows his growth as a musician. Presence’s experimentation on this track allowed him to push his musical boundaries and expand his sound. The music video for “Loving Me & Losing You” translates the trapped feeling visually. Read more about Presence and “Loving Me & Losing You” below!
Can you tell us what your single “Loving Me & Losing You” is about?
Presence: “I wrote ‘Loving Me & Losing You’ about my relationship between me and my music. So often in the creative world I feel like you can become a detriment to yourself for the enjoyment of others, and that’s the box I found myself in. Closed off in my room reliving my trauma over and over so I can make something for other people to hear. That’s what the ‘You’ is in the song.”
What was the creative process behind “Loving Me & Losing You?”
Presence: “I found the producer of this song (RXXXL) on YouTube about a year ago searching through obscure YouTube beat channels with less than a thousand subscribers. His sound was so unique and I knew I wanted to work with him in the future, so I reached out and we started working on original songs together. This beat is one of the first that he sent me, and the idea for the lyrics flowed immediately just based on what I was feeling at the time.”
Is there a message you are sending to listeners of “Loving Me & Losing You?”
Presence: “Not necessarily. My goal in this song was to just be honest about what I was feeling, and whatever conclusion the listener drew from that was up to them. The song is pretty open ended though and I think we all have something or someone we’re knowingly over attached to, so I knew the song would be something people could relate to.”
How has your sound developed from recording in the backseat of your dad’s Honda Accord to now upon the release of your latest single?
Presence: “When I was making my initial YouTube videos from the backseat I was pretty limited in what I could do creatively. Not just because the resources I had were limited, but my knowledge of creating music was so limited as well. Now though, with both of those things expanding, I have the ability to do so many different weird things with my voice and not just rap over a piano every song. That’s been really cool.”
This single shows personal growth of understanding what is best for you, but how have you grown as an artist through the creation of “Loving Me & Losing You?”
Presence: “I think sonically this is the most interesting song I’ve ever put out. Obviously the song is about me feeling trapped as an artist, and I think the aural representation of me getting out of that box is me expanding my sound and trying new things on this track. That along with the visuals really pushed my boundaries as an artist and have me excited to keep pushing further on future tracks.”
Did “Loving Me & Losing You,” come as a reflection on the process of understanding you may need to take a step back, or were you realizing in the moment of creating this song what you needed to do for yourself?
Presence: “It definitely came as a reflection of feelings I already was already having.”
Having been in a cycle as you say of being addicted to attention and living your teenage years for the hundreds of thousands of people online, what is your motivation now? How has this new mindset changed your daily life?
Presence: “I think I needed to remember why I started making music in the first place. When I wrote my first songs they were for me and nobody else. In a sense I needed to revert to my younger self and find the joy in all of this again.”
Having been vulnerable to your fans about the reasons for taking a step back, do you feel you have become closer with them? Do you think this provides a better glimpse into who you truly are?
Presence: “Perhaps. I’m not completely sure though. Maybe it’s a side of me they didn’t know existed.”
You also released a music video for this single — what was the creative process behind translating “Loving Me & Losing You” into a visual piece?
Presence: “Jake Heidecker, who directed the music video, is immensely gifted at turning the theme of a song into an idea that connects visually. I told him what the song was about and together while eating breakfast we mapped out the concept of me being trapped in a box while the world continued around me. Within a few days we were at the studio with a crew filming the video.”
What was your reaction to seeing the finished video?
Presence: “I was blown away. It looked better than it even did in my head.”
What are you most proud of upon the release of “Loving Me and Losing You?”
Presence: “I’m most proud of the growth in myself that’s clearly happened as a result of it. I had been holding onto a lot of feelings that I was finally able to release through writing and releasing this song.”
Make sure to stream Presence’s latest single “I’m Okay I Swear” dropping this Friday October 28th!