by mariah estran
photo by eli schmidt
Do you remember the era of the boyband? NSYNC and The Backstreet Boys ruled the Noughties. Synchronized dance moves in oversized clothing induced a roar of screams from dedicated followers. While the bouncy beats and chantey lyrics topped the charts. Yet, by the mid-2000s, a shift had occurred. Angsty, emotion-filled performers hit the airwaves. There was My Chemical Romance and Dashboard Confessional. It soon became hard to escape the dramatic hairstyles and smeared coal eyeliner, even for singer/producer Harrison Scott Kuykendall. “I have such a deep love for that emo-alternative sound – I’m from Chicago, so Fall Out Boy was huge,” he says when asked about a creative change of his own. The new solo project Soft Toys, and the surprise drop of the EP, Count Me Out.
“I think Count Me Out was kind of a breakthrough moment for me,” Harrison uncovers. When the pandemic hit hard in 2020, previously planned ventures were put on hold. This leading to a hiatus from the adored electro-pop duo, BHuman. When bandmates moved away, Harrison found himself alone, unveiling the fascination in the euphoria curated through nostalgia.
“I ended up adding a Travis Barker drum sample,” he describes on the new stylistic choice that drove the record. “It opened this whole new writing style that’s more confessional, stream of consciousness, than my old stuff has been.” Suddenly, memories of sweaty days at Warped Tour and heads covered in jagged, eye-covering hair came crawling back. “It was kind of an opportunity to go back and explore those sounds and aesthetics. Even the whole emo, sad boy attitude.”
That moody spirit was established, hitting the listener to the core in the title track. Synth keys progress to a deep drum cadence. Harrison’s vocals build to a ballad-worthy chorus as he sings of not being count out yet, yearning to still be by someone’s side. It’s a type of poetic lyricism that could have someone screaming at the top of their lungs, like the once emo anthems did thirteen years ago. “I feel like nostalgia always works in a 10 – 20-year cycle,” he explains when discussing this resurgence of sounds. “So, it’s like: ‘what were we listening to 20 years ago, what were we listening to 10 years ago?’”
There was clearly a rediscovery of interests from his past, such as this genre of music and the subculture. But it also never left due to Harrison growing up in the same city as the “Sugar, We’re Goin Down” creators. “This band (Fall Out Boy) from the town nearby became huge — that sound permeated my world,” he shares. So, it was only a matter of time before that influence found a home – that home being within Soft Toys.
There was complete freedom to produce and write while developing the EP. The removal of outside voices allowed for the project to be thoroughly thought out on Harrison's terms. A world was being created, and as a visual artist himself, he saw an opportunity to immerse listeners into an environment thriving off Y2K throwbacks. Collaborating with Evanie Frausto and George Kan (Genie Kausto), plus his partner, photographer Eli Schmidt, they worked to interpret the image “Count Me Out” evoked. “I feel like the video, and the track, is just inseparable to me,” Harrison shares. “I think part of what I hope I bring to the table is it’s not only music that I’ve written and produced, but I’m also creating this visual."
With no strict guidelines for the music video, he sent the team mood boards. They consisted of bold makeup, punk hair, and boy-band-esque fashion. The result intensified the emotion on the track as it sets up the theme and structure the entire EP was built on. In three and a half minutes, viewers are placed in a time capsule complete with gel-twisted hair, flame-printed dress shirts, and wide-legged trousers paired with oversized logos. However, it is the simplicity of each frame. The vulnerability of singing into the camera, looking into someone’s eyes lined in makeup-drawn tears, pushes the observer to have their own connection.
He set up the universe in which the EP can lie. A concoction of alternative edge meets pop-group fantasy. However, it is not just visually noticeable. The five songs on the project still attest to the bubbly disposition in the previous projects Harrison has appeared on, such as BHuman. In five songs; we go from a bass-pounding, synth-heavy dance number on “BodyFree,” to a slappy guitar opener in “Peace & Quiet” — complete with feisty words and a memorable “blah blah blah” moment. “I’ve always been obsessed with crazy, over-produced bubble-gummy pop music,” he says, continuing to mention some of the greats like Britney Spears and Robyn. Each of those influences oozing from the closing track “All Or Nothing.” A distinct effervescence that feels like something that would play out of a boom box while you sit in front of a mirror, applying a new layer of juicy tube lip gloss. “I find it really inspiring who can put together songs in such a way that they stick in people's minds. I think that’s the balance I’m trying to achieve. Nostalgia, earworm, but also with this sort of emotional, stream of consciousness lyricism.”
There were times when the singer would endlessly search for the perfect melody or an equally flawless set of lyrics. Those moments resulted in mechanical results. Count Me Out has become the product of overcoming those obstacles. “I feel like, with his album, I let myself not overthink,” he explains. The key might have been letting go of the notion of the optimum song. Boundaries were pushed just based on reconnecting with the past. It is an instant connection with the listener through clean, sentimental production. “I think not self-editing was important for this,” Harrison continues to discuss. “Even if I didn’t love the way I said something, I was like ‘no, that’s what you were thinking.’ That’s what I really wanted to bring into it."
Maybe tapping into those memories, those teenage feelings of rebellion, no inhibition, could remind us to create without worry and create a product that’s delightfully refreshed. As the Soft Toys creator says himself, “the best music, and the best art, isn’t overthought.”